Sometimes the quietest whispers of our bones can guide us toward the truth. Stephanie Foo, What My Bones Know.
Five years of listening to the subtle anguish oozing from my skeleton. Although it was plush with excessive anxiety, fear, anger, stress, shame, the weight of my choices and the choice of others, I started excavating. It is like chipping away coal in search of diamonds. Difficult.
Discovering truth is like digging up treasures on a map that only has symbols. To do anything good in life, you must dig deep. It was a ticking clock that I could not shut off, knowing that if I didn’t there could be a disastrous explosion of my heart, or a stroke or a black whole of depression I would not be able to hurdle. You see, trauma is disease to our bones, but God is the creator of bones and the healer of diseases.
To encourage those healing your body and mind after trauma. Sometimes, you pack your mind and body with your pain, and it takes a slow and methodical undoing. It shows up in a body racked with aching, swollen joints, nerves, shakes, catatonic immobility, weight gain, or loss, an inability to go back certain places, fear, shame. Especially if it’s many traumas over many years or decades of covering it up, pushing it down, ignoring warning signs, busyness, etc.
Balancing must be centered on a firm foundation. Jesus, of course. But listen to this. Our bones are our physical foundation. Women were created out of one rib bone.
My beginning was laid on shifting sand. It was flawed with secrets and lies, abuse and shame, and a God who measures your life based on the steps you take, not on His son’s gift of salvation. How do you heal the cracks, expose the hidden things and deceptions haunting you, and the false shame on our spirit from other’s offenses? How do I trust God and break the spiritual bondage of false religion and my unfortunate mental understanding of love?
The Book What my Bones Know by Stefanie Foo helped break through to the marrow of what the abuse had done to my body and mind. I needed a different angle, a new discovery, an understanding of what had happened to me. I had covered it up entirely too long and lived a truly meaningful life because God was walking with me through it, but you can only stuff pain down for so long before the infection festers.
The abusive relationship was a SYMPTOM of a much deeper problem within my soul. In the covering up, you only put band aids on the wound without cleaning it. Therefore, the infection returns sometimes with a vengeance.
Listen to these quotes from the book they are vitamins that nourish me.
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Our bones remember even when our mind forgets.
Listen closely to the rhythm of the bones can reveal the secrets of the universe.
The bones are a map, leading us back to our true selves.
The bones crave freedom, the freedom to dance to their own unique rhythm.
It is in the bones that courage resides.
Our bones carry the stories of resilience and survival.
Within the depth of our bones lies the strength to overcome any obstacles.
The bones speak a language of truth that cannot be silenced.
The bones teach us patience; they understand the power of time.
In the silence of our bones, we find the strength to heal.
The bones hold the memories of forgotten dreams.
Our bones are a testament to the resilience of the human spirit.
Within the marrow of our bones lies the power to transform.
Listen to the symphonies of your bones, for they hold the key to your soul.
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WOW! Powerful imagery for me, whose bones had been broken, beaten, bruised, misused, and were screaming to be heard. Some of that I actually did to myself.
We have to admit it to heal it.
Since June of 2019, I have been educating, excavating, equipping, and empowering the tearing down and rebuilding my foundation of sand with a foundation of hope. healing bone and marrow of the physical, mental, and spiritual.
It took 50 years of abuses done to my frame and mind, and it was going take buckling my seat belt for a turbulent, shaky ride. This is the work we avoid because it doesn’t feel great to undo, unravel, or unpack.
I did completely unravel. I did undo misconceptions and so many lies. I did unpack some things I shouldn’t be carrying. I still struggle. But now I have tools and truths.
I started the rebuilding process using Nehemiah as my guide. During that process, I had my heart checked. I had my bones scanned. I had my blood analyzed. I had endless exams. I had lengthy conversations with friends, fellow sufferers, coaches, counselors, and most especially, my Savior. I went to Women at the Well and Well Women retreats for healing. I started writing about my journey. I gave myself grace. I also read endless books about abuse and the effects of it on my body and soul. Most importantly, what God wants for us.
Listen to what God says about bones in His word.
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Ezekiel 37:1-10
He asked me, “Son of man, can these bones live?” I said, “Sovereign Lord, you alone know.” Then he said to me, “Prophesy to these bones and say to them, ‘Dry bones, hear the word of the Lord! This is what the Sovereign Lord says to these bones: I will make breath enter you, and you will come to life..
Proverbs 17:22
A joyful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.
Proverbs 3:7-8
Be not wise in your own eyes; fear the Lord, and turn away from evil. It will be healing to your flesh and refreshment to your bones.
Proverbs 15:30
The light of the eyes rejoices the heart, and good news refreshes the bones.
Psalm 51:8
Let me hear joy and gladness; let the bones that you have broken rejoice
Hebrews 4:12
For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart.
Proverbs 14:30
A tranquil heart gives life to the flesh, but envy makes the bones rot
Proverbs 16:24
Gracious words are like a honeycomb, sweetness to the soul and health to the body.
Proverbs 3:8
It will be healing to your flesh and refreshment to your bones.
Job 40:18
His bones are tubes of bronze, his limbs like bars of iron
Psalms 34:20
He keeps all his bones; not one of them is broken.
Isaiah 58:11
And the Lord will guide you continually and satisfy your desire in scorched places and make your bones strong; and you shall be like a watered garden, like a spring of water, whose waters do not fail.
Job 10:8-12
Your hands fashioned and made me, and now you have destroyed me altogether. Remember that you have made me like clay; and will you return me to the dust? Did you not pour me out like milk and curdle me like cheese? You clothed me with skin and flesh, and knit me together with bones and sinews. You have granted me life and steadfast love, and your care has preserved my spirit.
Psalms 33:3
For when I kept silent, my bones wasted away through my groaning all day long.
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Truth. I was crushed in spirit. I did need refreshment and good news. My bones were dried up painful reminders of what led me to this place. I needed God to breathe new life into my heart, mind, body, and spirit.
Physically, the doctors increased my blood pressure meds, put me on cholesterol meds, suggested a Mediterranean diet, and regular exercise. I was deficient in all B vitamins and all hormones. My A1C was borderline diabetic. My iron was low. My body was covered in arthritis in all my joints. I did physical therapy for my back, which helped. Then, I began taking arthritis meds, and it has also helped. Now I am on a glp1 for weight and A1C and do B12 injections.
All of the medical was done over 2023 and now into 2024. Although it is a journey, I can say that most of the physical pain is gone. I can walk without limping. My back doesn’t scream in the mornings or with a little activity. I am not using the cane my nephew let me borrow. I have returned to swimming 2-3 days a week, and the 1/2 mile is becoming easier. I have lost 37 lbs of baggage. My A1C has dropped to 5.2, glucose is under 100, and my cholesterol is actually too low. I am hopeful I can remove the meds soon.
All of the physical, mental and spiritual work has been a process done incrementally through the last five years. Digging up My bones is a metaphor for cleaning house. Rooting out the deceptions that have been hidden, pushing through to the other side of lies, to see truth. Strengthening our bodies with nourishment and exercise physically and through God’s word. We tend to brush dust around and call it clean. How can we find balance if we are forever off kilter; in pain, lost in human translation?
Our foundation of hope, Jesus, is health to our bodies and strength to our bones. May you hear the symphonies of your bones open wide your ears to worship in balance with truth. Sometimes it is but a whisper, we must shut out the noise, the chaos, the world to hear it. One truth that has helped me find true balance in God, is not taking man at his word, but seeking the answers in scripture to back it all up. The only one who will never fail you, is God.
Join me on this journey to better health and healing. As we focus on balancing our lives, the foundational truths we believe are barometers of stability. We must set that absolute truth in stone, solidify it in our heart and run from lies and deception. To do that we must know, study, pray, worship, memorize, and trust God and His word. That is sometimes difficult when we are battling the hard places, I am just here to testify to you that Jesus saves, Jesus heals, Jesus is with you, and I will be here to walk with you any way I can. Let’s dig up those bones together.
Heavenly Father may the digging up of our bones, the seeking of truth, the healing of our bodies, our minds and our souls be refreshed daily in your word of truth. Help us to balance our life with Jesus and the cross as our foundation of truth as we seek to counterbalance the other hats we wear. If we have any lies and deceptions that are rooted, uproot them from our stubborn frames, and heal our bones deep. Your word is eternal, your salvation is freedom, your symphony of grace is the most beautiful of melodies playing within our souls. Help us hear the music in spite of the noise. Heal us with your whispers of love and tender hand. In Christ, Susanne
Susanne Moore 
Very powerful blog. Thank you for sharing your experience and helping women walk through their journey with you.
Thank you for commenting on the blog. I love sharing my story. This one was hard to articulate. I hope it came across well.